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.He was delusional.His sense of reality was eroded by the drugs he did and, I guessed, the lack of drugs he needed.I wanted to hate him for this, but I couldn’t.The double doors swung open again and I looked up as the nurse furrowed her brow over a clipboard."Nick Swain?""Yes?" I flew to my feet far too quickly.The entire room shifted violently to one side, then the other, and I grabbed a chair for balance.A hand grabbed my arm and another held my shoulder.When the room stopped moving, the gentleman who’d been sitting a few chairs over was beside me, holding me upright.He cocked his head."You all right, son?""Yeah," I said."Just, dizzy.I’m okay."His expression asked if I was sure, and when I gave him a reassuring smile, he released my arm, then lifted his hand off my shoulder.The nurse regarded me with the same concern."I’m fine, I’m fine," I said."How is Andrew?"She blinked, glancing at her clipboard as if she’d forgotten why she’d called me in the first place."I assume you’re Nick Swain?"I nodded.She gestured for me to follow her."Mr.Carmichael isasking to see you."The relief that came with those simple words was greater than the moment I’d no longer had Jesse Kendall’s gun against my head.He’s alive.I can breathe again."How is he?" I asked on the way through the double doors."I don’t have any details beyond that." She didn’t look at me, just flipped through some pages on the clipboard before tucking it under her arm again."I’d just come on shift and he was asking for you."I nodded and followed her into the elevator.That was probably the stock excuse for avoiding questions, since it was a bit less confrontational than 'that’s confidential' or 'I can’t discuss it with you because you’re not listed as next of kin.' Leon and I had our own such prerecorded responses.I didn’t care, though.Andrew was alive and he was conscious.I couldn’t ask for more.The elevator lurched, as did my stomach.I closed my eyes and leaned against the wall, gripping the railing and trying not to groan."Are you all right?" the nurse asked.I swallowed hard and nodded slowly."Elevators and concussions don’t get along very well." My face and neck probably raised even more questions, but she didn’t ask.After we’d gotten out of the elevator and I’d regained my balance enough to follow her, we continued down the hall.I tried to ignore every sign we passed that said 'Intensive Care Unit', reassuring myself they wouldn’t have let me in at all if his condition was that bad.The 'family members only' policy was set in stone for most ICU wings.When we reached the end of the hall, the ICU sign pointed left, but we turned right.We passed a few doors, then she stopped and gestured inside.I stepped into the room and the nurse closed the door behind me, severing the noise and activity, leaving me with only my heartbeat and the quiet beeps of machinery.And there he was.He was semi-reclined and looked like he’d fallen asleep.His heavily-bandaged right arm was in a sling, the left connected to an IV.His fingers were loosely wrapped around a morphine or Demerol pump.He had more color than he had earlier, though he was still pale.The electrocardiogram’s rhythmic beeps were faint, but they were there, confirming he was alive.Yes, he was alive.Thank God, he was alive.As I came closer, he stirred, blinking a few times.When our eyes met, he smiled."Hey you," he said, barely whispering."Hey." I slipped my hand under his, careful not to disturb his IV or jostle the pump.Even as clammy as his skin was, there was just enough warmth to dislodge the icy fear that had taken up residence in my chest.The fear was gone, but guilt held its ground."How are you feeling?" I asked.He smiled, if weakly."I think I’d rather be pepper-sprayed.""That bad?""Worse.""Well, I’m glad you’re okay." I leaned down to gently kiss his forehead, thankful just to feel the warmth of his skin.As I started to stand again, he eyed me, a grin tugging the corners of his slightly pale lips."Come on, now," he said, "my mouth isn’t broken.""I don’t know, that might fall under your restricted activities for a while.""I can think of a few things that do, but kissing you isn’t one of them.Now get down here."I laughed and kissed him.It was just a light, gentle kiss, but we both drew it out for a moment.I ran my fingers through his hair, and at least for a little while, relief pushed the guilt aside.When I stood, the room shifted.I grabbed the bedrail, taking a deep breath as the world righted itself for the millionth time."You okay?" he asked."Just a side effect of beating my head against a wall," I muttered."You and that gallows humor." He chuckled."Might be more comfortable if you sit."There was a chair beside the bed, but that wasn’t quite close enough to him, so I took a seat on the side of the bed.He didn’t mind; he let the pain medicine pump layacross his chest and put his hand over mine on my leg.For the longest time, neither of us spoke.The ECG made its noise in the background, but between us, there was silence.Eventually, Andrew said, "How’s Jesse?"I shrugged, avoiding his eyes."He was still conscious when they brought him in.I’m guessing he’ll pull through." He was going to pull through from the beginning, my conscience reminded me.He’d had better odds from the start.His injuries weren’t nearly as catastrophic as I’d thought.Andrew’s were worse than I’d thought."Nick?"I didn’t realize how long the silence had lingered until he broke it with my name.My eyes flicked up, meeting his."You okay?"I managed to look him in the eye."Back there, at my apartment…" I swallowed."That was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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