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."Why don't you do them as you go?”I shrugged, took the knitting from him and tucked it safely in my bag."I don't know…I just like to…touch the finished product, say good-bye to it…I can do that if I take an hour when I'm done and weave in all the ends.”Bracken made a non-committal sound in the darkness, and I felt myself nodding off.So I was not ready, I was exposed and unprepared, when he suddenly said, "Davy.You need to weave in your ends with her.”Abruptly I was awake, and without warning I was in tears.I wasn't fighting them, they came freely, and I was somewhat surprised to find that they didn't hurt when you didn't fight them.I'm so stupid sometimes—how many times did I have to cry to learn this lesson? Still…"That wasn't fair, Brack," I complained thickly, wiping my face with my hands, and still they kept coming.He sat up and wrapped his arm around my back, and I leaned my cheek against his hair."I wasn't ready." My breath caught on a sob, and he waited, patiently, but I breathed it out and thought I was done."We're never ready, beloved," he whispered, stroking my hair, "but she's gone—you know it.We'll find out how, and if Kyle survives we'll help him.But you need to grieve.”"Remember that night at the Chevron station?" Like I said, not one of our best moments."That old man died and you told me 'It's more mete that other's grieve'.Remember? You phrased it so old-fashioned…it stuck in my head…I just keep thinking…" Oh Goddess, I was hiccupping with the effort to hold it together and to keep my sorrow civilized, and his arm tightened around my back and he took my tear-puddled hand in his and kissed it."I just keep thinking that she's not mine to grieve for…she's got friends and family and people who have known her for years, and I just ran around the track with her—she didn't even know who I was…”"Shhh…sh…sh…" He rose to his knees and gathered me in close, and whispered things in my hair."If you grieve because you'll miss her, then she's yours to grieve for," he murmured, "but if it's only guilt…well, then, deal with the guilt…”"I'll miss her…I'll miss her…I'll…" And then it was gone, that barrier in my chest, that tough I've-got-everything-under-control-and-every-emotion-in-a-box blockade, and I wept freely and quietly for my friend.When I was done, and Bracken was mopping my face with my T-shirt, I said, "She never got to hear me sing." Because it was a talent I was particularly proud of, but too shy to share."Would it be okay if I sang for her?”Bracken nodded and kissed my forehead."I think it would be perfect,” he said, and his throat sounded rough.I'd put them through a lot this last day, I thought dismally."Would you sing with me? Would Green?" Bracken nodded, and we both looked towards Green, his eyes closed, his chest moving in and out in the silence of sleep—or so we thought."I'd love to sing with you beloved," he said dryly, opening his lovely green eyes "if only you'd shut up and come to bed so I can hold you too.”Of course I did, and Green and Bracken held me tight until I slept soundly through the rising of the sun and beyond.GREENAlien forms of worshipNo one saw them enter the church.According to the press, Davis Stacia Kelly, daughter of a prominent businessman, had been murdered after leaving dinner with her family in Stanford Ranch, when she'd told them she was moving in with her boyfriend, whom they had never met.(Oh yes, Kyle was high on the suspect list—or would have been if anyone could remember what he looked like or where he lived.) Her father was well known, her mother was on a lot of community boards, and the evening attendance at the Episcopalian service on K Street was both healthy and well publicized.For the three vampires, two were-creatures, two sidhe and little sorceress, it was like being top ten on America's most wanted and strolling into a police station for a drink of water.It was possible they might escape unnoticed, but only because a church with a thousand cameras was the last place anyone would expect the supernatural.Cory held no idea of how risky it would be."Are you going to tell her?" Bracken asked Green nervously as they watched everybody else load into the Suburban."Nope," he replied, smiling at Cory as she scowled at the folds of her black dress and hauled them in after her, trying to keep them out from under Renny's cat feet and Nicky's dress shoes."There's going to be cameras everywhere, Green…" And Green turned the full force of his gaze on Cory's due'alle."You promised,” he said, and his voice didn't rise, but his position was unspeakably clear."So did I.'Neither time nor place did then adhere, yet you would make both?'“"'They make themselves.'" Bracken sighed."Do you ever quote Hamlet? Twelfth Night? Romeo and Juliet?”"Frequently." Green gathered his camel dress coat around his crème colored suit and straightened Cory's scarf around his neck as he moved around the front of the vehicle."'If it be not now, it will be to come, and if it be not to come, it will be now.'“"We're going to get cau-aught," Bracken murmured to himself as they got into the Suburban, but Green could tell that it was just because it made him feel better to worry.Everyone was dressed for the funeral except Renny, who had insisted on coming in cat form.Given who would be waiting in the back of the church, Green thought that bringing a were-creature might be the prudent thing to do.The trip down to Sacramento was actually a pretty lively affair—as though the vampires who hadn't known Davy were making things easier on Cory, Renny, Bracken and Nicky who had, and it was hard to be depressed as they cleared Foresthill and took the freeway entrance West.The foothills had blossomed green under the rain, and the wildflowers had finally emerged.Since the fate of their child was the reason for the split between the Goddess and her mate, Easter wasn't really celebrated among the Goddess' get, but its counterpart, Oestre, the spring equinox, was in less than a week and Northern California's traditional two weeks of spring were here.The air coming in through the side windows was a complicated braid of cool and warm, flowers and damp concrete.Green watched intermittently in the rearview mirror as Cory smiled and bantered with the vampires and tested the air coming in through the vented window, her expression both dreamy and sad.She caught Green's eyes in the rearview mirror, and answered his questioning brow with, "I didn't give up anything for Lent [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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