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.”When Keirith made a sound of denial, his father shook his head fiercely.“You cast out his spirit and took his body.According to our laws, that’s a crime.But I can’t see it that way.You fought him as an equal with the only weapon you had.”“I don’t regret casting out Xevhan’s spirit.It’s.” He had to take a deep breath before he could say the name.“It’s Urkiat I keep thinking about.”“Aye.We’ll always bear the burden of his death.”“It’s my burden, not yours.”“Don’t.”“Sometimes, I wish I had cast out his spirit.That would have been better than leaving you to—”“Don’t!”His father shoved himself to his feet.“We both bear the guilt.There’s nothing we can say or do to change that.You were trying to save me.You made a choice.I understand.”But he would never forgive him.And Urkiat’s death would always lie between them.His father sank down beside him again.Keirith wondered if his expression had betrayed his thoughts or if his father had simply sensed them.Ever since their spirits had dwelled together, each of them seemed to know without words what the other was thinking and feeling.“Urkiat had committed an act that he thought was unforgivable.And I made him confront it.I didn’t realize what I was asking of him.If I had.” He shrugged helplessly.“Facing his past was one of the hardest things Urkiat ever did.But I think it gave him peace.Sometimes it helps to speak of the things that haunt you.Bring them into the light.Look at them plainly.If you’re lucky, the thing you fear shrinks down to a size you can handle.But even if it still scares you, at least it’s out in the open, not lurking in the shadows.Or in your dreams.”His father sounded so tired and so old.As if the weight of his life would crush him.“Urkiat died because of us.But he also died for us.If we waste our lives in guilt and shame, we dishonor his death.You and I—we’ve both felt.tainted by the things that have happened to us, the choices we’ve made.We’ve looked at the future and wondered if we could bear it.Dying is easy, son.You know that now.It’s living that’s hard.But as long as there are those who love you, it’s worth the struggle.And no matter what, I’ll be here.”His father’s fingers groped across the mantle, then stopped.Slowly, Keirith reached out and covered them with his.And then he began his tale, from those first moments of terror on the ship to his last conversation with Natha.When he was finished, his father whispered, “I wish to gods it could have been me.That would be easier to bear.”Keirith squeezed the clenched fist.In the same fierce whisper, his father said, “We’ll get through this.We will.”After that, they sat together in silence, watching Bel’s dawning light chase away the shadows.Chapter 49FOR GRIANE, MIDSUMMER passed in a numbing haze of fear and recrimination.While the rest of the tribe offered sacrifices to ensure the Holly-Lord’s victory, she could only wonder if her son had been sacrificed to appease the hungry gods of the raiders.Waking and dreaming, she pictured Gortin’s vision, only now it was Keirith’s eyes staring up at the priest’s dagger, Keirith’s blood drenching the altar stone, Keirith’s body convulsing in its death throes.A few of her kinfolk still spoke of Darak and Keirith as if they were alive, but most avoided mentioning them at all.Others filled their places now.At Midsummer, Othak stood beside Gortin, wearing the brown robe of the initiate.Sanok still recited the legend of the Oak and the Holly, but he stumbled over the words so often that Nemek had to finish the tale.Although no one said so, it was clear that Nemek was Memory-Keeper in all but name.Callie went daily to the lake with offerings for Lacha.Faelia disappeared into the forest.And every night, Griane turned her face to the night sky, watching Gheala grow fat and counting the days until she must fulfill her bargain with Fellgair.To avert Faelia’s suspicions, she began going to the glade every morning at dawn to pour an offering of water over the heart-oak’s roots.To her surprise, the ritual soothed her, allowing her to voice her fears to the sacred tree and giving her the strength to face another day.Perhaps the Maker heard her prayers as well, for the nightmares abated; she even managed to sleep soundly the night before she was to meet Fellgair.She dressed quietly that morning and slung a waterskin over her shoulder [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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